Happy 1st Birthday Benjamin Graham!!!

the picture above is right when they wheeled me back to my room from the OR.

i love this picture with his arms and legs crossed. this is how he loved to stay inside my belly.

i honestly don't even know where to begin with this post. i have so many thoughts and so many emotions and i simply cannot get them in order.

it's amazing to me how fast time passes. at 6:27pm on Sept. 5, 2008 after 2.5 LONGGGGG hours of breathing and pushing and then finally being wheeled into the operating room, dr. h pulled you out of my belly. when i first heard dr. h say how beautiful you were and hearing your cry, i completely lost it. she put you up to my face and i kissed your sweet lil conehead and balled like a little baby. after 9.5 months of anticipating your arrival, there you finally were. it was bittersweet because i already missed having you in my belly, having you all to myself, knowing that because i was alive, so were you. as selfish as it might have been, it was amazing to have you all to myself, feeling you kick and move and do kung fu in my belly. feeling every time that you would hiccup. and you hiccuped a lot. i honestly loved every single second of being pregnant with you. yes, even through the terrible indigestion and swelling because i knew the outcome was going to be so worth it. and yes, it totally was.

for the entire birth story, you can click here http://theneiplings.blogspot.com/2008/09/announcing-arrival-of-benjamin-graham.html

our first year together has been so wonderful. I never knew I could love someone so much. i mean, don't get me wrong, i absolutely adore your daddy who is by the way, the most amazing daddy EVER, but the love for your child is just completely different. one day you will understand this when you have children of your own. that is, if i ever even let you leave home.

thank you for such a wonderful year. you are such an amazing, smart and healthy little boy and I am so proud and so thankful that you are our son. we have truly been blessed. this has been the best year of my life.

yesterday i took cupcakes to graham's school to celebrate his birthday.

all of the pictures below were taken this morning, right when he woke up...bedhead and all!

then i remembered that i had a birthday onesie for him to wear today.

i still can't believe this big ol chunk was only 6lbs11oz when he was born. WOW!! he has grown so much!

Tomorrow we are having a birthday party with family and a few friends. I will be sure to post everything on Monday.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY BOY!!!