Wednesday, March 11, 2009


hmmmm. well, I am just sitting here staring at a blank screen and not really knowing where to start with this post. It's going to be a little somber and I'm sorry but that's just the mood that I am in. I'll be lucky to make it through this post without breaking down like a baby because quite honestly, I AM down. REALLY DOWN.

Let me just start from the beginning, I guess. For those of you that know me, you know that I have been pretty small my entire life, speaking weight and size wise. My weight, of course, has always fluctuated five pounds up, five pounds down, ten pounds up, ten pounds down. I've always been a dietier and I will go through periods of working out A LOT and then not really working out much at all. Being "thin" has never really come natural for me. I've had to work to be that way. So when I got pregnant, I really watched how much I gained. I never really OVER-ATE and I would stay as active as I could. granted, i wasn't at the gym working out like a mad woman but i would do the occasional walk and lift small weights, do some squats, etc. The only issue I had during my pregnancy as far as weight went was my sodium problem. I gained a lot of water and fluid weight because i cannot live without three things: salt, Tony Chachere's, and soy sauce (come on, give me a break-I'm half asian!). I ended up gaining almost 50 lbs during my pregnancy and actually lost quite a bit of it after I had Graham due to breastfeeding, eating right and working out. The pounds were coming off at a steady rate and I was quite pleased. Until recently, that is.

Within the last month and a half, I started feeling extremely tired and fatigued but very restless. I have also been really weak, forgetful, can't concentrate much less think, i have a lot of aches and pains, bloating and swelling in my face, hands, feet (really just EVERYWHERE). My belly had actually become quite flat and then pretty much overnight I was just BLOATED...and I seriously thought many times that I was pregnant. and even had Chad buy several pregnancy tests. also, i still hadn't started my period which was weird since it had been two months since I had stopped breastfeeding Graham. but the biggest thing (i know, this is going to sound extremely vain and I am sorry) is that I have gained so much weight back. it has seriously put me into a state of depression because I have been doing so good at eating well and exercising and was pleased with seeing results and then having it all come back. I just didn't know what to do or what was going on.

So, last Friday I had my 6 month post operation check up with my ob-gyn, Dr. H, and I told her everything that has been going on. She decided to do some blood work and see if it was my thyroid. She called me yesterday evening before I left work and sure enough, she said I had hypothyroidism. Apparantly, my thyroid is not producing enough hormones and it's causing my metabolism to work very slowly. I think that is how it works. i wish i could have remembered more of what she said but my mind was just racing and my head was spinning. i really didn't know how to feel or how to react.

In a way, I was very relieved to finally KNOW what was causing me to feel so bad and to have me gain this weight back. But then the other side of me is feeling down about it since I don't know very much. I have read on the internet that it's a disease that i will have to deal with for the rest of my life and I will have to be on medication forever as well. I'm just so confused about it all. I mean, i'm sitting here wondering if I should keep working out and eating right only to never lose the weight and even maybe gain MORE??? How is having hypothyroidism going to affect my life?

I'm trying so hard to look on the bright side and to be positive. I am very thankful that this is the worst thing that i have had to deal with so far. I'm very blessed and thankful to have such a healthy and beautiful little boy, a wonderful husband, awesome friends and family, a great job that I love, a warm home, and a car to drive. God really has blessed me with more than I could ever ask for.

I am going to see my general practitioner, Dr. M, tomorrow at 3pm. I am anxious and so ready to see her so i can get some answers and find out what kind of treatment we will have to do.

Has anyone ever had to deal with this or know of anyone that has?


Brandi said...

I'm so sorry I don't know of anyone who has ever experienced this so I have no advice to give. I wanted to let you know though I will be praying for you. You are strong and will work through this. It is wonderful that you have such a loving family and friends there to support you.

Amy, David and Caroline said...

I did a little research on it last night and I think if you start the proper medication, it is very manageable. It is VERY common in women for many different reasons. I have had a couple of friends that have recently been diagnosed with it. If you ever want to talk with them, let me know. They had all the symptoms that you have!! I know it is so overwhelming, but you are not the only one going through it. I can't wait for you to get better answers tomorrow. If I were you, I would make a list of questions, so you don't forget a thing. I love you and I am here for you if you just want to come over and cry. I will have no problem crying with you :) Tears come easily these days!!!

The Burton Family said...

I'm sorry girl! At least you found out the reason why you have been feeling so bad. My mom has hypothyroidism so i have to get mine checked every time i go to the Dr. b/c it can be hereditary. It is very manageable with meds. I think my mom actually lost some weight when she got on the meds. Good luck at the appt. I'll be thinking about you!

hannah fulks said...

hi stephanie! thank you for the sweet comment you left on our blog. i love jennifer!

crazy how graham and pratt are so close in age! i wish i had found you while pregnant! those were the days when i really needed people to complain to! :) people who understood a pregnant during july and august!

sorry to hear about the hypothroidism stuff. but from what i know about it, it is extremely manageable with meds.

i'll be thinking of you and your sweet family. i'll keep you in our prayers. and again, so nice to "meet" you!

i love reading other blogs! enjoy your night!

hannah fulks.

Lea Liz said...

Aww girl I'm sorry, but at least you found why you have felt so bad! Like everyone elsehas said I think with the correct meds, you will be fine! good luck at your drs appt!

Lea Liz said...

Aww girl I'm sorry, but at least you found why you have felt so bad! Like everyone elsehas said I think with the correct meds, you will be fine! good luck at your drs appt!

Whitney & Chris said...

Oh girl, so sorry to hear about it. It is VERY manageable on the bright side.:) My Thyroid is low so I have to get it checked often because of the tiredness, headaches, pregnancy feelings as well. My mom recently began taking medicine for it too. Many of our friends will start to deal with it as we grow older. Hang in here and don't believe everything you read on the web. That can be a scary place sometimes.
You're beautiful inside and out and we're all here for ya!

The Neipling's~Chad, Stephanie and Graham said...

Thank you all so much for all of your comments and encouragement! Right now is definitely the time when I need all of you. I am anxious to talk to my doctor this afternoon and hopefully get on some medication ASAP...I am sick and tired of being sick and tired! :) I will write an update as soon as I can! Love you all and thank you again!

MELISSA said...

in the last couple of weeks i have had several people tell me they think i may have a thyroid problem. it runs in my family. i have been gaining weight, super tired, losing hair, and several other symptoms have also shown up. im pretty scared because i know it can cause fertility problems. also, i dont like gaining weight! you know how i feel i'm sure. i can't go to the doctor either, because i dont have insurance right now. besides medicine, do you know of anything i can do to help this if it really is something i'm going to have to deal with?